Adventures in marriage: the good, bad, and ugly.

Breaking the Silence

2010-03-15T08:45:00.001-07:00

I haven't written much in this blog this year. Partially because I've been busy. But more because since last year, my entire life feels like it's become a taboo. So instead of writing about the things that really matter to me, I update people on the mundane aspects of our life. But really, this has been one of the hardest years of my life, and thus also the hardest years of Adam's life as well.

Last year at this time, I remember calling my husband on the phone from Florida and telling him that I had discovered that my mom was having an affair. This year, I went to Florida with my mom and her new (not so new?) boyfriend. In the interim, my parents separated (for the most part) thier lives, thier possessions, and thier children. I became an adult child of divorce.

Most people expect that as an adult child, you shouldn't experience the same negative consequences as younger children. People expect you to be the strong one, to not hurt as much because you've grown up and moved out. People also expect that you shouldn't talk about your grief, because it's unfair to your parents and siblings to draw attention to yourself. You are called upon to be the supporter, the shoulder to cry on, the glue, the impartial observer. I have even been accused by family members of purposely trying to make my parents life difficult simply because of my emotional reaction to the situation. I decided to write this blog, inspired by a caring advisor, other online blogs and support groups, and the book "The Way They Were", because I no longer accept having my feelings and experience invalidated simply because I'm an adult.

I want to say that adult children experience the same negative reaction to divorce as younger children do; it's just different. The grief is far reaching, and for the most part, I've grieved in silence because I felt that I wasn't allowed to be sad or distressed-- after all, I'm an adult! I found also that it comes in waves-- just when I thought my life and my feelings were together again, something would happen and everything seemed to dissolve. Even a year later, I still hurt from time to time. I didn't experience the shock or false belief that most adult children do, believing that my childhood home was perfect and that my parents should never have split. My parents weren't perfect. Thier marriage wasn't perfect. They just did the best they could. But I do miss it. I do feel that my childhood memories have been violated in a way, that everything about my childhood has been a joke. My mom, like many divorcing parents, tried to erase any physical evidence of her former life. I don't blame her-- I would probably do the same. But the result is that the home that I grew up in is gone. It is literally a physically different structure than it was when I lived there, with many decorative and remodeled modifications. People have told me that I'm being overdramatic when I say that I feel like my childhood is gone, but every remnant of the place where I lived has been replaced by something else. The kitchen was remodeled a few years ago, my room redecorated, the floors redone, etc etc. Don't get me wrong, I endorsed these changes. I still do. But I also don't have a home anymore-- the memories I have of my life took place in a different house, with a different family, one that no longer exists.

Also, I have been called upon (not without a lot of acquiecence on my part) to be the primary support of my family. In a way, this never changed-- I was always the control freak of my family. Once I was old enough to drive, I took over a lot of parenting duties as my parents worked longer and longer hours. I was the glue. Again, I don't blame my parents-- I relished it. I know it was an unhealthy role to have as a child, but it gave me meaning in my life, and pride. The fact that I was the one to take the kids to doctors and dentist appointments, go to school functions, cook dinner, etc became as source of unhealthy pride and martyrdom for me. When my parents separated, my role was the same, but different-- I helped my dad move, I helped my mom's boyfriend move, I helped the kids adjust, to the best of my ability. This, too, I discovered, is pretty normal for adult children of divorce. In a way it wasn't hard-- it gave me something to do. Teaching my dad how to cook chicken offered some unique bonding experiences. :) But therapists struggle to get adult children of divorce to set boundaries-- a skill I never mastered (still haven't), and I'm sure in some ways (invisible to me) my own emotional health and marriage have suffered.

Finally, I'm a graduate student. If I'm good at anything, it's multi-tasking, and balencing. I work all the time. I study all the time. I am a super busy lady. I never get to see my husband, and sometimes my family and my emotions get put on hold so I can finish a project, study for an exam, or read something for dissertation. It's a lot to manage. Unlike other people who experience divorce, I often feel like I never had time to grieve. I am a slow but thorough griever. It's been a year and I still struggle. But I feel like I don't have time for this. A lot of times my sadness and hurt comes out in a frenzied tirade about my computer breaking down, getting a B (instead of an A) on an exam, or a professor who's being a jerk. Most times the only time I have alone is the 30 minute drive rushing between campus and my parents houses on the northside, and that's when I cry. I am trying my best. But most of the time "my best" feels inadequate. I feel like I'm never a good enough student, sister, daughter, wife. A lot of that is my own baggage from before the divorce, but some of it is just me, racing against time and ignoring my broken life/heart.

Of course there's a lot more behind all this-- I would be lying if I said I wasn't deeply angry and frusterated with the situation. But I tried to keep this both objective an honest... for once, this is about me, and not my parents. This is about what I feel, not what they did or didn't do. I know that we'll come out on the other side okay. But I, personally, am tired of "faking it" until then. I'm still broken. But today I decided to be honest about it, in hopes that maybe someone would learn soemthing from it, or at least understand me a little bit better. This is where I am.

My funny valentine

2010-02-15T10:24:00.000-08:00

I always feel like Valentine's Day is really only acknowledged by two groups of people: Those who are single and feel like everyone else is having the greatest day of thier life, and those who are in a new relationship and really are having the greatest day of thier life. For the rest of us, it's pretty much just an ordinary day. :) But nonetheless, not focusing on valentine's day too much this year made it probably the greatest valentine's day of my life thus far, so here's a rundown of our celebration:

Adam and I have almost never celebrated valentine's day ON valentines day, as a result of the fact that he usually has to work and we both feel like it's just another stupid day anyway. But we do usually use it as an excuse to have an extra-special date night somewhere around Feb. 14th. This year we celebrated by getting couple's massages on Thursday, which was the BEST PRESENT EVER. I suprised Adam with it, but next year we decided to forego the suprise and just make it a tradition. He brought me flowers on Monday and Thursday of this week, so that was lovely :) and on Wednesday I got my real valentine's present, which was a Fruedian magic 8 ball. :) I love it! We also went out to dinner at our favorite sushi restaurant.

The rest of the weekend Adam pretty had to work, but on Friday night I made the most fattening and delicious homemade alfredo sauce, and on Saturday morning some friends and I went to the Indianapolis Winter Farmer's market, which I highly recommend for good bread, tea, and meats! (Not too much produce this time of year, but still a good time.) My favorite part was the highly pissed off rabbit sitting in a cage who's feces were being sold as plant fertilizer.

Saturday night was the Brazilian Carnival adventure-- we went to The Jazz Kitchen in BR for their celebration of Carnival. It was SUPER PACKED. Nonetheless we drank some traditional Brazilian drinks and danced to what appeared to be a soccer team playing in a drum circle. At some point a creepy Brazilian guy started dancing with me, and me being totally naive and unfamiliar with the culture of clubs or Carnival, thought he was just being nice. Of course, before too long he started trying to kiss me, which I akwardly avoided. Then he said "kiss me" and I said, "No! I'm married!" and he said "It's okay, I'm engaged!" and then I ran for the hills. Everyone (including Adam) thought this was hilarious except me.

On actual V-day, my friend Mollie came down, and we ended up meeting Adam after work and my dad at The Claddaugh on the northside, which was nearly deserted. I had the best time drinking beers and laughing it up with good friends and family, and eating the best comfort food in Indianapolis, in my humble opinion. With the olypics on in the background, ridiculous 90s romance music (Think Kaci & Jojo's "All My Life") and hilarious stories going all around, I couldn't have asked for a better (yet unromantic) Valentine's Day. :)

New Office!

2010-01-23T14:51:00.000-08:00

So, we finally got around to redoing the office!! We had been meaning to do it for a while, ever since the rabbit started eating huge holes in the carpet in there. It was necessary to put new flooring down. We finally got our new home buyer tax credit, so we bought some high-end laminate flooring. Since I also happened to be on break, I repainted the room. Adam put down the floors ALL BY HIMSELF, and redid all the trim too. :) So now I have a new office for the new semester. If I do say so myself, it looks great! Here are the before and after pictures:

Before:

After:

I love my husband!! And I love my new office!! :)

We made it 2010.

2010-01-02T21:23:00.001-08:00

There comes a time in which the circumstances in your life seem so impossible and unpleasant that it becomes difficult to update blogs/send letters/tell others how you are doing. This is that time.

This is the blog entry to let you all know that we are still alive, that Christmas was bearable but not notable, and that the house has not burned down or been consumed by the rabbit (yet).

Better updates to come in 2010. I hope.

Highlights of Our First Thanksgiving

2009-11-28T14:49:00.001-08:00

Okay, okay, technically this is our SECOND Thanksgiving as a married couple, but last year at this time we were barely married. Also, this is the first year in our new house, for Thanksgiving, AND the first year I cooked a turkey. It was really fantastic! So I thought I would share some highlights. I am one of those people who love holidays, so even though I was dreading this year, celebrating the first holiday season with my parents separated, it actually wasn't that bad! It was fun to have it at our house, and the food was really good. So here are the highlights:

prepping the turkey:

Hanging out, waiting for the turkey to cook:

First cooked Thanksgiving turkey! I forgot to take the giblets out, but it turned out okay anyway. :)

Sitting down to a small but delicious thanksgiving. :)

Pies! Coconut Cream and Pumpkin, made by yours truly.

We also acquired and decorated our first Christmas tree in our new house. :) The last picture is of me bundled up to go out at midnight to an outlet mall. It was nuts, but I had never done it before, so it turned out to be kind of a cool experience.

And then, then day after Thanksgiving, I went out with some friends to see the "circle of lights" ceremony where they light the giant tree on the Circle in Indy.

Holidays approaching...

2009-11-22T22:30:00.000-08:00

I realize that it's been FOREVER since we updated this thing, but since the one of us who updates has been in grad school... life's gotten busy. :) I cannot believe how fast this first semester has gone. I equally cannot believe that at this time next year, I'll be seeing clients and doing therapy for the first time. Crazy, huh? Meanwhile, I've been having a really fun time meeting/hanging out with new friends, getting involved in some cool research projects, and memorizing the nearly the whole DSM-IV-TR. (that last one is not so fun.) The 1st semester is drawing to a close, and as far as I know, I'm passing, so that's great. Everyone's already getting geared up for applying for practicum placements at the beginning of next semester, and matching with dissertation advisors in April.

Meanwhile... the house is really starting to feel like "home" now that the holidays are almost here. Adam put up lights, we winterized the lawn, I planted bulbs for the spring... It's great to have a place to come home to and not have to feel like it's only temporary. What a blessing! We're looking forward to doing a low-key thanksgiving at our house. Then I get a a WHOLE MONTH off, which is probably the best Christmas present ever, and I have no idea what I'm going to do with myself. Sleep, probably. :)

Some exciting things coming soon:
January: niece Lilly turns 1!!
February: Alisha & Jeff's baby due
March: I'm going to Disney World for my sis' final national cheer competition, Chris & Michelle getting married!!!
June: My sis graduates high school!
August: TRIP TO GREECE!!!! Amy & Dave getting married!

I always feel like I should post pictures of things we've done, but we haven't really done anything worth documenting since the last post, so here's a picture of me trying to work, haha:

A recap of our first year as newlyweds.

2009-09-27T20:57:00.000-07:00

Adam and I have officially been married a year. :) I won't lie, it has been one hell of a roller coaster ride. In most ways, our marriage was the most stable thing in both of our lives this year, and for that I am grateful. The things we have endured together this year, both joy and pain, I feel certain I, at least, could not have endured alone. Anyway, on a lighter note, I thought I would post some photo highlights from our first year as married couple....

In october, right after we got married, we went to Kauai for our honeymoon and it was the BEST VACATION EVER.

Then we came home and we got a rabbit by accident, but we named her Lucy.

After that the next exciting thing was pretty much Christmas, which we celebrated as a married couple for the first time.

We celebrated New Year's Eve in St. Martin, which was great!

In January, after we came back, we got a new niece, born on election day, named Lily Kate Johnson.

And then in February, we went skiing/snowboarding with our good friends Mollie & Martin!

After that we pretty much just hung out until May, when we became homeowners for the first time! :)

The summer was a whirlwind of vacations, family reunions, and weddings.

After that I went to grad school, which has no accompanying pictures thus far, and then the twins turned 2....

Then finally, we celebrated our first year anniversary by going to a B&B in Brown County, Mountain Biking, and eating the top of our wedding cake. :) (Which was still really delicious, by the way!)

All in all I would say it was a pretty good year, and that we're definitely looking forward to the next one. :)

A long-overdue update

2009-09-07T19:46:00.000-07:00

Lots is going on here in the Johnson household! We've pretty much put all the home decorating and updates on hold indefinitely, since the real work has begun around here. :) Adam and I have shifted roles slightly as a new chapter of our lives is unfolding. I am now starting my third week of grad school and am officially the "student" of the household. It has been a really busy time so far, and I am getting in the groove of reading/studying/spending time with my new classmates. I guess going into this I kind of thought it would be like college on steroids, but it's really not at all. It's a totally new type of thing, and on the first day on campus we took an oath, much like the hippocratic oath. It seemed kind of silly at the time, but it really set the precedent for the fact that we are no longer students. We are doctors in training. We are being trained to assimilate vast quantities of knowledge and also to begin thinking of ourselves as doctors, to begin thinking like clinicians. One of our professors said to us on the first day, "You may feel like your professors are asking too much of you, and that every professor thinks that their class is the most important class. Well, in a way, every class is the most important class, because every class translates into patient care, and your first patient won't be a cadaver."

So that's a little bit what my transition has been like so far. And of course there's the more practical fact that in the first two weeks, I've already gone through a ream of paper and an ink cartridge. :) We're doing about 300+ pages of reading for every week, so it's a really good think I've got a study group. And we haven't even really started doing tests/assignments yet!! At least it's all interesting. :)

Adam has shifted into the role of primary breadwinner, and I will confess that this has been a bit stressful for both of us. When I quit my job, we lost about a third of our income, so he's now in charge of the finances and has been working a lot of overtime (while searching for a new job) in order to compensate. Also with my new, erratic student schedule, it's harder to find time to be together. We did get to go home this weekend for the twins b-day, spent sometime with his parents, and then went mini-golfing/go-karting today (Labor Day) so we have a little time together. Next weekend we're going to brown county for a much-needed weekend away to celebrate our 1-year anniversary. :) Also we're getting some 1-yr anniversary photos done, so look for those to come. :)

Also, I don't know if I mentioned this, but both of the birds are fully-flighted now, so that's exciting (Malcolm really enjoys testing the limits of physics and flying as close to your head as possible), and we're currently trying to match the bunny with a friend. :) We took her on a bunny date last weekend and she met Bill, who accidentally humped her head. She then attempted to claw his eyes out and came home friend-less. It was not a match. Stay tuned as we go through the rabbit version of "The Bachelorette".

The Johnson Household: Design-on-a-Dime edition

2009-08-01T17:25:00.000-07:00

It's really hard to believe that the summer is almost over! I have orientation for school in a couple weeks, and my brother goes back to school a week from Tuesday (really early!) so I decided we should share what we've been doing all summer! Adam and I spent a lot of time apart this summer (unfortunately) while I was off doing things with my family, but when we were together, we did a lot of stuff at the house! Mostly cosmetic stuff, of course, but the house looks totally different! I thought it would be better to "show" rather than "tell", so here are the before and after shots.

The Garden
Before:

Labor Day:

Aug. 1st:

The Backyard
Before:

After:

The Living Room
Before:

After:

Kitchen
Before:

After:

Master Bed
Before:

After:

Master Bath
Before:

After:

That's the house! The office and the hall bath look pretty much the same... and I didn't take any before pictures of the guest bedroom, but it looks AWESOME and it's almost done, so stay tuned for more pictures. :)

The Great Dirt Redistribution Project

2009-06-15T20:06:00.001-07:00

This weekend, we endeavoured to fill in the pit in our backyard with dirt, so that we could plant grass seed there. On Friday, we had 10 cubic yards of dirt dumped on our driveway, which we proceeded to take wheelbarrow-load by wheelbarrow-load back to the back yard and spread it out. It took two days, and my dad calculated that we spread about 12 tons of dirt. Ouch!

Before:

The mountain of dirt:

I'm happy because I haven't actually started doing anything yet...

The finished product!:

The after-effects of hauling 12 tons of dirt without wearing sunscreen....

So, after 2 days and 12 tons worth of dirt, we're both really sore and really sunburnt! But we got it done. Hallelujah.

Summer in the city

2009-06-12T18:23:00.000-07:00

Life is good here. I mean, really good. The kind of good you don't even want to talk about because what if you wake up someday and it's just gone. We're happily settling into our new life as homeowners. The house is so great and beautiful, and we've finally got the better part of it unpacked. Adam's parents came down a few weeks ago and helped us paint the living room (blue-grey, with a grey couch, blue armchair, and red accents) and the kitchen (tan) so it's starting to really feel like *our* place. Last night I also finally unpacked and put together the guest bedroom, so we can now finally have guests! The rabbit is happily destroying everything we love and hold dear, and the birds are flying around comfortably like they've always lived there. I am ready to start school in the fall, but in the meantime I have been hanging out with my bro and doing delightfully fun things like going to Holiday World, watching the new Pixar Movie "Up" and playing mini-golf. My dad bought a ping pong table for his new house, so Adam and I are insanely jealous but we get over there to play doubles ping pong as much as possible.

It's hard to believe time is fyling by so fast; I hear it speeds up as you get older. I turn 24 at the end of this month (gag), which I will be celebrating by going to B-town twice to see Steve Earle on the 26th with my dad and hubby, and Mat Kearney on my actual birthday. Also, in 3 months we will be celebrating our 1 year anniversary. The jury is still out, but I'll let you know the verdict on marriage then. :)

Otherwise life is pretty good. I joined a new house church that is teaching me so much, and I'm excited to see where God is taking me through this new community. We're about to study "The Irresistible Revolution" by Shane Claiborne and I feel like crying out "finally, a church group that gets me!" My hope is that we can learn to be ordinary radicals together, and inspire everyone around us with love and compassion. Adam and I are learning to take the good with the bad and be greatful for every good gift we have despite the struggles. WE love our families, each other, and we do the best we can! :)

New Beginnings

2009-05-25T11:51:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've updated this (we've been busy!) so I thought I would post to say that Adam and I are extremely happy and we've moved into our new house! :) We got the house, we moved in May 3rd, and everything is going swimmingly! Now we're working on our projects and my new garden. I started a vegetable garden, and though it is a lot of work, it is very gratifying. I also got registered for classes for the fall, so I'm all set for the beginning to my psych program. Also, I will have every Thursday and Friday off, so yay.

This week is my last week of work and after that I will be hanging out with Douglass and Molly for the summer, and then heading back to school. So Adam and I are really enjoying moving on to the next phase of our lives, and we LOVE LOVE LOVE being married and being homeowners. :) Here are some pictures of our house...

And so it goes...

2009-04-08T17:24:00.000-07:00

...as one chapter ends, another begins. Or something like that. Isn't that how people describe the bittersweet passage of time? I (Emily) was listening to the song "Tenderness on the Block" today by Warren Zevon, and it took me back to a time when my dad used to play it for me and say that it reminded him of me growing up, etc etc. Sadly, I'm all "grown up", Warren has been dead for more than 5 years, and my dad, well, my parents are getting a divorce and my dad's moving out of the house I grew up in, with a mom and a dad and two siblings. I have been somewhat shocked and overwhelmed by the amount of grief I've experienced over this. I thought at 23 I should be mostly immune to my parents lives and decisions, but as Anne Lamott put it, no matter how old you are when your parents die, you're still an orphan. (Not that this is akin to my parents dying, but I can appreciate the "age-appropriate emotion" theme here.) So it's been hard to post anything for a while, because as this has been happening it has been consuming my thoughts and yet nothing was really certain for a time, so I wasn't really at liberty to talk about it. Adam and I are very sad, but he is an amazingly supportive husband and I don't know what I would do with out him.

As far as the new chapter, Adam and I elected to stay in Indianapolis as I shared before, and I will be going to the University of Indianapolis. I am very excited, though it seems very far off and hard to wrap my brain around a time in the near future when things will ever be "normal" again. Still, I look forward to being the best person I can be, and studying and working with people, which is really my life's joy, and I expect it to be very fulfilling. Our lease is up at the end of this month, which means that our apartment is a wreck and in the terrible packing transition, and also that we'll be "homeless" pretty soon. We will be staying at my parents house for a time, though I have to admit it doesn't feel very much like "home" anymore, given the current situation. But I will be "babysitting" Douglass over the summer, and enjoying spending time with my siblings, and giving them as much a sense of normalcy as I know how,

In addition, the real reason for me finally deciding to post all this is that Adam and I have been house hunting, and we made our first offer on a home tonight. So, God-willing, and a lot of paperwork later, we'll be well ensconced in a charming 3-bedroom ranch on the south side in Franklin township. So that is a reason to be happy, and we do feel blessed with this opportunity. It's a bittersweet time.

2009-03-30T11:10:00.001-07:00

Adam and I have big things in the works lately, and the only reason I haven't posted is because we STILL have big things happening, but they are not yet finalized. So, I'll tell you what I do know: Out of the 4 interviews I did for grad school (I canceled most of the other ones) I got 3 offers, and I accepted the one at the University of Indianapolis. As much as we would have loved to move to Chicago, we took the high road as far as cost is concerned, and I'm still very excited about the program at UIndy. I love the professors and the resources here, and who knows, maybe we'll move away someday (or maybe not).

So that's the big news from our corner. The other thing is, we got pre-approved for a mortgage, so we're pretty excited about that. We've been doing some preliminary house hunting and we're going out with our realtor next weekend, so hopefully we'll be homeowners soon enough! That's pretty much it for now. When there's more news, we'll share. :)

The update you've all been waiting for...

2009-03-05T14:02:00.000-08:00

So, since we last posted, the major thing that happened was that I (Emily) got accepted to graduate school. Yes my friends, I'm actually going to be a clinical psychologist. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I got accepted to my top two choices Wheaton College in Chicago and University of Indianapolis. So I haven't posted since we got the good (fantastic!) news because we haven't really decided what to do yet!

I don't really want to say anything else because everything's sort of up in the air...however, I will say that we put in our intent to vacate notice at our apartment, and we have to make a decision about school by April 15th. So, by April 15th we'll know where we're moving, and by April 30th we'll be out of here! We'll let you know more when we know more! But we're excited and blessed by these new exciting changes!

Skiing Adventures and the latest steps on my quest to becoming a doctoral student

2009-02-14T17:34:00.001-08:00

Last weekend, Adam and I went skiing with Mollie and Martin, and we had a fantastic time! Even though we weren't really stressed out about anything, it was nice to have a "getaway" for us. :) Adam snowboarded and I skied. The snow was better the first day and it was so WARM!! about 40 degrees-- we barely needed to wear any winter gear.

This weekend I jetted off to my first interview, at University of Northern Colorado. It was extremely exhausting, but I think it was a good experience. I was able to see the program first hand and what they offered. The actual interview was short and in large groups, so I'm not really sure how much benefit there was there, but I was able to talk to all the faculty members and many current grad students. I feel like now that I'm this far in to the process, I will be lucky to get 1 or 2 offers from schools, and hopefully they will be the best fit for me... I realized that just because you want to go somewhere doesn't make is a good match for you. I am, however, excited to see what the other programs have to offer me and do my next interviews. The only bad thing about the experience was that I had to travel so much in a 24 hour period, and I was ridiculously sick! (I still am.) When I got home, I took today off work from my part-time job and literally slept all day. I'm hoping I feel better by my next campus visit which is next Friday!!

Most of the time we're just happy at home with the birds. I don't think non-bird people realize how much birds influence your life. We're not like those people who treat their animals like their children-- we know they're not like kids! But they are like really intelligent and vocal cats and dogs. As Malcolm gets older, he's developing a really entertaining personality. For example, today I was taking a nap and I work up in a panic thinking I heard voices in the apartment, but really it was just Malcolm talking to himself. :) We rearranged Max's cage this weekend and he's still mad about that. :)

As for Valentine's day... we didn't do much, what with Adam working and me home sick. Though Adam did bring me flowers last night when he picked me up at the airport, which was super sweet. :) We're planning a fondue night sometime soon for our "valentine's day" though Adam says we can do it on some other equally arbitrary day. :)

Let the globetrotting begin

2009-02-05T08:16:00.000-08:00

Well... I guess it's more like United States trotting, to be honest. I am going to be traveling quite a bit in the next two months. This weekend Adam and I are going on a mini-vacation-- we're going to Michigan to to go skiing with a couple of friends from college. I'm pretty excited.

The weekend after that, I'm off to Denver for a grad school interview, then back to Indy for another, then back to Denver for another, and finally to Florida for Molly's cheer competition in March. The only bummer thing is that the only trip I'll be taking with my husband is to MI; all the others are solo adventures.

I found out this week that I did not get accepted to my top choice school, and I was pretty upset about that. It's hard not to take it too bad, but I understand that Ph.D. programs are uber-hard to get into. (One of my favorite, very talented professors from college applied to 10 programs and got an offer from 1.) All that's left to do is put my best foot forward going to all the interviews I was fortunate enough to land. Wish me luck.

News and photos

2009-01-25T08:22:00.001-08:00

Here's the latest from the Johnson home:

*First of all, it is snowing. We didn't see that coming.
*We have a new niece. We said that already. We're really excited.
*I (Emily) have heard from 2 schools and have been invited for 2 interviews (2 for 2!) I heard from University of Northern Colorado this weekend and they want me to come to Greely, CO to interview for a position in their Ph.D program on the 13th of February. While this is very exciting, we need to figure out how we're going to afford the trips!
* We finally got ALL our wedding pictures sorted and albumized, and we put up our photo display on the wall in our dining room and it looks fantastic! We put up a canvas print of our cake cutting surrounded by smaller silver frames of other wedding pictures:

Finally, a picture of Malcolm "hanging around" and entertaining himself:

Welcome to the world, Lillian Kate! (Lily.)

2009-01-22T15:17:00.001-08:00

As you can see, Adam and I have a new niece! Her name is Lillian Kate Johnson, and she was born at 9:20 a.m. on inaguration day (1/20/09). 7 lbs, 6 oz. 20 inches long.

We love her!!!

Baby, it's cold outside.

2009-01-18T17:59:00.001-08:00

It has been extremely cold in Indianapolis this week. In honor of (or perhaps in spite of) the weather, I cooked pot roast, mashed potatoes and green beans for the fam for dinner. Now Adam and I are watching the Steelers/Ravens game and it's not looking so good for the Ravens. Adam and I both worked all week, so it's nice to be able to chill out at home if only for a few hours.

This week I secured an interview at the University of Indianapolis for a position in their doctoral program but I haven't heard from any other schools. Hopefully I shouldn't have to wait much longer. In the meantime, I found out that despite the funding changes given by the state of Indiana, my job won't be eliminated, as least not for now. I'll be working with my boss and my boss's boss to devise a new community program, but the details are still pretty fuzzy.

We planned a ski trip with Mollie and Martin for the first weekend of Feb. and we are so excited. I haven't been skiing in years and Adam's going to be snowboarding. We found a great little B&B in Southern Michigan with a killer ski package and a jacuzzi to boot. Exciting to have a mini vacation!

Mistake of the week: On friday night, I gave the bunny a bath. Apparently rabbits are self-cleaning, like ovens. She was very unhappy with me and is still holding a grudge. And, despite the bathing, she's still shedding all over the place, but at least the shedding smells like shampoo.

Sheba the Destroyer

2009-01-13T08:46:00.000-08:00

I'm thinking of renaming our rabbit (Lucy) Sheba the destroyer... would that be bad for her self-esteem? The first week we got her she chewed through my laptop power cord, but then we got wise and but cord- wrap around all our cords. However, she continues to move from one room of the house to the next, destroying any valuable items she can find. Baby gates do not keep her out, oh no. She can leap a gate in a single bound. Yesterday she descended on our Scrabble game, which I rescued, but I'm running out of storage space that is counter-level or above! She also has taken to "re-modeling" her cage, i.e, dumping and throwing her food dish and litter box. Adam bought a really strong magnet to attach the food bowl to the bottom of the cage (cage floor is metal) but somehow she outsmarted that...

Also, Max and Malcolm invented a new game yesterday...Max, who is flighted, flies to the window and watches for any potential dangers (a dog, a hawk, a leaf blowing in the breeze, etc). Should he spot one, which happens at least every 5 minutes, he announces it loudly to Malcolm, who sounds the alarm with his earsplitting screeches. Good thing this new development has occurred to keep our apartment a danger-free zone, because before all this commotion, we just had cougars stalking around like crazy...

Welcome to our blog!

2009-01-10T13:08:00.000-08:00

Emily here. I've decided at long last to abandon LiveJournal and join the scores of newly married couples and young families on Blogspot. It seems there's more of a forum here for the lengthy ramblings of ordinary life. So I plan to use this blog to update friends and family on the goings on of the newly created Johnson family, and if I can get Adam to blog on occasion, I will. :) If you're really lucky, I might even narrate a few of my batshitcrazy dreams, which I like to share with unsuspecting friends and family over dinner. Adam thinks I should write a book about them-- trust me, you've never heard dreams like these.

Meanwhile, we'll treat you the the adventures of our newlywed life and our practice children! (I.e., Max, Malcolm, and Lucy, our two parrots and rabbit.)